I don’t have a lot of time, but since I was a big ol’ worrying baby and posted something personal yesterday, it’s only fair that I update on that.
Disclaimer: This post isn’t about dogs, so if you only like reading about dogs… stop reading here. This is just about boring old me. Following today’s post, I hope to be back to only talking about things with four legs and fur.
Second Disclaimer: If you don’t want the details – everything is okay and the worry was (mostly) for nothing. You can stop reading here. If you like details and don’t mind getting into the personal stuff, then keep reading.
If you’re still here…
First, thank you SO MUCH to everyone who left me kind thoughts, well wishes, prayers, and overall good juju yesterday!! It really meant a lot to me. Blogville peeps are the very, very, very best!
Second, I never thought I’d be so happy to hear the words ‘Fibrocystic Breasts‘. I can smile and laugh about it now, but nothing was funny on Tuesday.
That day, I was having my oh-so-fun well-woman exam, and the doc found a lump while doing the breast exam. “Oh yes, there’s definitely a lump over here. We’re going to refer you for a mammogram, and they may also do an ultrasound,” she says, as she’s pinching a particular spot and jotting notes about how big she thinks it is. “Is this tender?” Hell yes, it’s tender!! Stop manhandling the thing!
I didn’t say that. But I wanted to. No matter, as it was nothing compared to the “big squeeze”, or rather, many big squeezes, that I experienced today.
I’m not yet at the recommended age to start having screening mammograms, so I’ve never had one before. Well, this was supposed to be a diagnostic mammogram, and they take more views than they do on a screening mammogram. Oh. Oh good. Because this squashing business is awesome. And I love having my breasts irradiated. Please do take a few more views.
I jest. Yes, it was very uncomfortable, sometimes even plenty darn painful, but it wasn’t intolerable. My gals… although their spirits have been crushed… will live to see another day.
After the mammogram, I sat in a small waiting room with some other half-gowned ladies waiting for our next turn in the cattle line. Ultrasound was up next for me… can’t say for the others.
My name was called and I met with a very nice sonographer who probed a bit in the problem area with the magic wand (okay, it’s called a transducer) and immediately asked me if I consume a lot of caffeine. Hmm… should I tell her that I live for coffee? I get a sheepish look on my face and she says, “It’s okay, hon… we all do.” So then I spill the beans. The coffee beans, as it were. And she confesses her addiction as well, except that her drug of choice is tea. We chat like old pals about our vices. Anyway, she tells me that if nothing else is found, that cutting back on caffeine (or eliminating it completely, if possible) helps a lot of women who have fibrocystic breasts, if that is indeed my problem. She also asked if I take Vitamin E, and if so, how much? I do, and 200 IU. She suggests that upping it to 400 or more might help and I can discuss that with the doctor who will be in in a moment. He’s going to wand me some more and talk about everything. Super.
Doc comes in, wands a bit more, though oddly very gently in comparison to the sonographer. Sometimes you really have to press to get good views, so frankly I would’ve been fine if he was a little more aggressive. Gosh, this is sounding saucy. Believe me, it wasn’t at all saucy. He tells me that he isn’t seeing any abnormal tissue and he thinks that I probably just have fibrocystic breasts. This is going to sound strange, but I swear he seemed disappointed to be giving me good news. The sonographer was still in there, of course, and brought up the whole reducing caffeine/upping Vitamin E spiel again and the doc agreed. He recommended that I do self-exams once a month and let my regular doc know if I noticed any new or different lumps. I told him that self-exams were difficult because I can always feel lumps here and there. He said, “Yes, they’re often going to feel lumpy, but only YOU know if something is new or different. Your doctor isn’t going to remember what your breasts feel like.” Well, jeebus Doc, I hope not. That would be downright creepy.
Again, not something I said out loud.
So yeah, that’s it. Unless they missed something (I always have that paranoia), there is no c-word to worry about. I can safely and fibrocystic breastically get back to talking about dog stuff and you’ll never, ever have to hear such personal information about me again.
I can only hope that BlogPaws doesn’t decide to pull their network ads due to unauthorized overuse of the word ‘breasts’ in a post.
Image credit: Dobhran’s Humorama
What good news! And LOL, you’re such a funny and engaging writer!
Nola’s Mom
Emma’s mom here. No big deal! I have had three of them and had all three removed with outpatient surgery. The first two were when I was in my twenties and the next I think I was about forty. I panicked each time thinking I was the one that would be in the small percentage that had cancer but they were all benign cysts. I have found no rhyme or reason as to where they came from and I don’t care to find anymore but it is what it is. Emma gets them too, so I give her monthly breast exams but hers go away on their own and are fluid filled, my are usually hard lumps. So glad you are okay as I know how scary it is waiting!
Hooray for good news! And, lol, yes, that would be decidely creepy if your doc remembered what your breasts felt like between visits!
Never had a smash-o-gram before. What a youngster you are!
Glad the worrying was for nothing! That’s how we like it!
Yikes – how scary! I’m so glad it turned out okay. I had to go through that because I found a lump in my armpit which turned out to be “musculature” of all things. I know how fun those mammos can be. 🙁
Good that it’s over and you can laugh about it now though! PHEW!
This sounds just the same as what I’ve been reading on my blogging friend, Bren’s blog. Very glad there is no cancer there. My mom is going through something similar right now. She has a lump and had to go in for the mammogram and sonogram. Except for that they wanted to do a biopsy. Her biopsy was done last week and she’s been calling them for about 2 days for results but no one will give them to her.. and yes we know they have the results. Her appt to talk about the results with the doctor is tomorrow afternoon, so I guess we’ll know more then.
Woot woot!! That’s good news indeed! Aren’t the mammograms fun? Once I had the mammographer (is that a word or did I just make that up?) call and say they ‘saw a shadow’ usually it’s nothing but if I wanted to come in she would redo it. Hell no! If you effed it up the first time I’m not letting you get a second shot. I went to a different place. It was normal. Then I told my Dr. I wanted an ultrasound, and he asked why. I said for a conclusive decision. He said ‘well you have one, this one says it’s nothing.’ I WANTED to say, if it were your nuts you’d want a conclusion too. I didn’t of course. But I won and got the ultrasound and sure enough it was a shadow.
I know how scared you must have been and I’m so glad that you got your appointments and your results right away! Thanks for sharing. I checked in yesterday but must have missed this post.
Thank the good Lord that all is OK! Our Mommy has the same thing and the first time it was noticed was at her very first Mamo also. She had to go every 6 months for a few years and thankfully it all turned out well.
We are doing the happy dance for you!
Hugs,
Lily Belle & Muffin
We’re so happy you are OK.
Matilda Grey-Snout, Livvie, Kessie and Terry-human
What great news! I’m not only happy for you, but I laughed while reading this post.
Oh, those collars are reindeer nappa leather with ribbon overlays. 🙂
Been there and done all that. Not fun. Welcome to the fun world of mammograms. 🙂 Reducing caffeine does help. Glad all is well.
I’m so glad things went the right way, and that you were able to write about this with humor! I also think it’s fine to go off the pet topic for a bit, because sharing this is a good way to help to curb the stress and worry of the whole ordeal. I recently read that people often come to our blogs because of the people behind them….and I know everyone out here cares about each other. It’s such a nice thing, isn’t it?
I’m so glad you went and had your breast check out. Those kind of things can be very scary imo. Thankfully, your diagnosis came out well. Will they continue to check you? I’m suppose to go every 6 months until my cysts either go away or change in size. Pain in the bum, ya know?
Glad to hear ya got good news!